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Health and Beauty Quiz

Who needs to sit in a doctor's waiting room? There's a quiz right here!

1. Rubbing the face with slices of fresh zucchino:
a) Relieves eye strain
b) Slowly but surely eases out wrinkles
c) Removes dead skin cells, giving you a brighter complexion
d) Helps to use up the zucchini that you shouldn’t have planted in the first place
2. Carrying large numbers of keys indicates:
a) A strong sense of security
b) A strong sense of insecurity
c) A hidden desire to pry into other people’s affairs
d) That you are probably a cleaning lady
3. People who own a lot of pets live longer than others because:
a) They spend so much money on Iams and Kitty Litter that they can’t afford butter, booze or Mc Donalds’
b) Constant bending to clean messes off the floor breaks up fat which would otherwise accumulate around the heart
c) They become too rattled to work out a decent suicide plan
d) Sleeping under a load of cats protects them from radioactivity
4. The diet of native Alaskans is unsuitable for Australians because:
a) Whales are now fully protected.
b) A high fat intake increases the danger of sunburn
c) It’s unbelievably dangerous to muck about with polar bears while wearing thongs and a fashion singlet
d) Haven’t you heard about our problems with the wheat surplus?
5. As a method of removing superfluous hair, shaving:
a) Stimulates regrowth
b) Inhibits regrowth
c) Causes malformation of hair follicles
d) Causes severe blocking of U pipes
6. The best way to encourage long fingernails is to:
a) Include large amounts of oysters, caviare and smoked salmon in your daily diet
b) Soak the fingers in dish washing liquid.
c) Employ servants
d) Stay in bed all day
7. Getting into a warm bath or shower:
a) Releases harmful substances from the blood stream.
b) Relaxes the digestive system, allowing better absorption of vitamins
c) Strengthens the muscles of the lower back
d) Makes the telephone ring
8. Jogging is best done just before dawn because:
a) The air is much purer at that time
b) Early morning chill stimulates the nervous system
c) The relative silence enhances brain function
d) There will be less people around to laugh at you
9. As far as possible, avoid the use of electrical appliances because:
a) Undetectable vibrations cause thinning of the hair.
b) When the skin is positively charged, bacteria are attracted to the sweat glands.
c) Proximity to electrical motors destroys the body’s natural magnetic field
d) Electricity accounts cause worry lines
10. Eating large quantities of garlic prevents colds and ’flu because:
a) The natural hotness of the garlic stimulates the lungs
b) Garlic has long been known to repel evil spirits
c) It contains fourteen secret herbs and chemicals which constitute a powerful antiseptic
d) People stay too far away to breath their germs in your face



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